It seems l am constantly reading about yet another consent violation, or some man has been a tad too pushy and over stepped the mark.
Ok lets see how we can reduce the chances of it happening to you.
Today almost everyone has a mobile phone and lo & behold it can connect you to all those people who care about you, so if you find yourself in a situation you feel uneasy about then phone a friend, phone a neighbour anyone who will come round to where you are and bail you out… If the situation is where you are being stopped from leaving or you genuinely feel threatened tap out 999 rather have them tell my granddaughters off then any harm come to them.
Meeting anyone off the net has its risks and if you can’t stand up for yourself then seriously l wouldn’t advise meeting strangers alone.
Treat internet meets like you would if your out with friends and someone is a bit too hands on, saying things you don’t like, leave the area if you can’t again use your bloody mobile and make a scene.
Now lets talk about the “predators” here on fet and every internet dating site, again grow a pair if you want to feel safe, its your safety your responsibility to do all that you can to stay safe. If a man starts telling you how to behave and what to do and you don’t wish too then say so, if your afraid too go to bathroom phone a friend to come round, don’t act like a victim or someone vulnerable.
Never ever let a stranger tie/restrain you first time, l don’t care how wonderful they are or who says how safe you will be, just don’t do it, always the next time when you feel confident with them.
All the safety advice as regards keeping safe on the streets is to try and look confident, muggers rapists ect do think twice if you look like too much hard work.
Time and time again l am bombarded with “men shouldn’t rape & stuff” but lets get in the real world where our prisons hold many men with convictions against children & women, because in the real world there are those who don’t think like most people. Our expectations of safety at best naive at worst stupid because we don’t have a utopian society where everybody is nice.
Just to finish off all these men who we complain about, all these men who violate others these men are our sons, our husbands, our fathers you get the idea so who is the very first role model to a boy? Who has the biggest influence in a young mans life? Yep its his mother, so perhaps instead of expecting the legal system to change things we can have a stronger impact on our menfolk by calling them out on sexist behaviour.
Updates, fet again full of talk about keeping safe, not seen anything about safe words which stops any ambiguity about consent violations, if safeword used everyone knows this means stop. So make sure before meeting anyone that you have something in place that will or should stop most immediately, this also can be adapted to include models, before meeting especially first time again use the traffic light system but make sure all parties are aware of it.
All togs should be ok with another person being with you if they have a problem with that then l would think long and hard before going.